So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
