Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.