How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
40s are totally the cure
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
