ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.