if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize