It's like God shit irony all over that family
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
