I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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