walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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