she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
