Sponge bath it is.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
