I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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