Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I want her autograph on my taint
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
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