hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
its not stalking. its research.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn