We're facebook friends in real life
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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