Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
