I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
