I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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