I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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