so that wasnt chicken after all
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
