He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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