please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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