Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize