On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
There's always time for handjobs
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
