Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
