did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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