Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
