We're facebook friends in real life
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
All I want is dick and wine.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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