I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
