I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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