It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
