God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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