Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
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Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
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I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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