its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
