her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
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My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
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So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.