think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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