Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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