I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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