Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
