my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
