and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
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