Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
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Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
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I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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