we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
