I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
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Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
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I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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