he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
