my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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