Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Randomize
