Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
