Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
