i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I don't deserve a penis
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
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