Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
