her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
This is the high leading the old right now
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
